With. Out. Fail. Every time I go somewhere w/ the kids, someone will smile and say, "Boy you've got your hands full!" And they don't know the half of it. I knew this would happen. I knew that once I got behind I'd start drowning in my to-do's. I don't know if I'll ever catch up!!! School is much more time consuming than last year. Trying to juggle school, household duties, meal preps and purchasing, hubby time, baby duty, and kiddo love....it's just really hard. I'm struggling these days. Struggling to keep up w/ all my responsibilities...and keep priorities in order. Some days I think I'll loose my mind! Other days....I know I already have! But I'm still thankful for these blessings and although I know I'm completely inadequate for the task, I trust that God can fill the gaps. His grace is sufficient. And oh how I pray that He will have mercy on my children for all my shortcomings as a mother!!!
Once when Suzannah was just a baby I had a dream. A horrible dream. A dream that she died. I remember crying and saying over and over again, "My arms are empty. My arms are empty. My arms are empty." My heart still aches just remembering. But thank God, my arms are not empty. My arms are very full. In fact, my laundry baskets are full, my sink is full, my car is full, my table is full, my lap is full, my bed is full and my heart is so very very full. So yes, I've got my hands full. Every day has it's challenges. But by the grace of God we get through them and every day is another opportunity to be a better mom and wife and try to savor these precious years that go by so quickly. I absolutely love being able to stay home w/ all of my kids every day and am so thankful that I can. I'm also thankful that I don't have to do it alone.
So, when these strangers look at me...sometimes w/ pity, sometimes w/ awe, sometimes w/ disgust, and sometimes w/ longing....and say, "Boy, you've got your hands full." My response is always, "I sure do....but I'm so very thankful!"