Tuesday, July 22, 2008

2 Year Anniversary

Our sweet Suzannah. Sunday marked the 2nd year since her diagnosis of Juvenile Diabetes. It has been a tough two years, but she's come a long way! The first month was an absolute nightmare. Now it's so much better. It's still not fair and she still struggles with not understanding. It still hurts, but she is resolved to the fact that it is just something she has to do. It's amazing what you can do when you realize you have no other options.

A lot of people think that she is amazing b/c their kid could never get shots and check their sugar, etc. I really want everyone to know that she is no super kid. She was just like every other kid out there....deathly afraid of shots and needles. We needed two, sometimes three people to hold her down for her shots for the first 8 months! She would scream and cry and ask us why we kept hurting her if we loved her?! It was heartbreaking and traumatic. It was the same response any child would have. And like any other child, she has learned to accept her fate. I wrote a lot about her journey here: http://texasneals.blogspot.com/2007/11/national-diabetes-awareness-month.html. Don't get me wrong, she is remarkable!!!!! I am in awe of how she has handled all of this.

This disease is my fourth "child." A "child" I didn't ask for but have to take care of nonetheless. It requires so much energy that some days I think I won't make it. But then I think about how I only have to take care of this "child" for 12 more years.....Suzannah will have to take care of it for the rest of her life. She will have to set her alarm every night somewhere between 12 and 2am to wake up and check her blood sugar. She will have to be conscious about her level of activity and what she has eaten before she drives home to visit from college. She will have to be careful constantly once she becomes a mother in charge of caring for her little ones. She will have to educate her friends on how to take care of her if she goes into a diabetic seizure. She will have to always be thinking and aware of so many things. She will never be able to be totally free. Sometimes I get so bogged down in the added complications of her life. I just rattled off a few things that run through a mothers mind when she has had a rough day managing her daughters sugar: A low that caused her to have to pour orange juice all over her daughter to try and get some of in down her throat as her daughter used all her strength to fight it. A high that caused her daughter to feel horrible and act in ways that she knew she shouldn't. Struggling w/ expectations and consequences for misbehavior during the high. Wondering how it all will affect her at college, having children, being a wife....in every area of her life.

Please know that we keep everything in perspective. She is doing fine. She looks great and is growing great. It is just hard. However, there is hope that maybe someday she will be free from this disease and that all the things I just mentioned will be a thing of the past. They are constantly studying and doing research for a cure. They are getting close. My prayer is that they will find a cure in time for Suzannah and all the other kids out there to benefit from it. That is why, in honor of her two year anniversary, we have decided to sign up to do a Walk to Cure Diabetes. I put a link on the upper left hand corner of my blog. It will be September 27 in Dallas. When you click the link you can donate money for the research or you can sign up to walk w/ us. Suzannah is so excited about it. I think it makes her feel special. :) I know that many of you continue to pray for her and I want you to know how very much that means to us! Thank you all for the encouragment you give her. See you at the walk!!! :)

8 comments:

YaYa and Pops said...

My Suzannah IS amazing.....and so are her Mommy and Daddy. Diabetes stinks and we all need a cure! GO SUZ!

TexasNeals said...

hope this post doesn't come across complianey. i was attempting to give a glimpse into our life the past two years and how wonderful a cure would be. no pity-parties. just sharing our reality. she really is doing well and we are SO greatful!! :)

Silverthornes said...

As a mother, I did NOT think this post came across as being a complaint - I appreciate your total honesty about this situation. I know it must be a constant struggle, I appreciate you making us aware of diabetes. I only had one friend in college I knew who had to take shots for it and I hated that he went through that.
Something that stood out to me was when you said "It's amazing what you can do when you realize you have no other options." It is so true!!
Anyway, I am proud of sweet Suzanne and proud of you as a wonderful mother who loves her daughter and wants the very best for her!
I think that walk for a cure is a great idea!!

Aimee said...

You were not being whiny. You were being honest. We all have our burdens to bear and how we decide to bear them is the biggest test of all. I believe you and your family are doing a wonderful job. Somehow, someway, God will get the glory out of this. You may never know it on this side of Heaven, but He will. Suzy-q is a hero amongst her friends! They are fascinated that she gives herself shots and doesn't cry. She's the "cool kid!"

Caldwell Clan said...

Hey Stac, where can I go to walk with you... in Corpus Christi? Is there a link that has all the walks in TX? Love you guys!!!

TexasNeals said...

audra, if you select "donate now" on the top right. then select walk to cure on the left. you can click on register to walk in texas and it will show you all the different places and when the walks will be held. wasn't sure if larado or houston would be closest? i'm not good w/ maps?! :) i do know there's nothing in corpus. sorry.

April said...

Wow, Stacey. I had not heard/read your full story until now. I am so grateful that you shared it. Indeed, it gives such insight into your world and your reality. My heart breaks for you. Know that you are all in our prayers. I most certainly hope they find a cure. Give that precious girl a hug from us, (Yeah, I know she's never met us!) and tell her we are proud of her.

Laura said...

You know we love Suz!! She is such a trooper and brave girl. We just signed up to walk with ya! We wouldn't miss it for the world!!

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