Our sweet Suzannah. Sunday marked the 2nd year since her diagnosis of Juvenile Diabetes. It has been a tough two years, but she's come a long way! The first month was an absolute nightmare. Now it's so much better. It's still not fair and she still struggles with not understanding. It still hurts, but she is resolved to the fact that it is just something she has to do. It's amazing what you can do when you realize you have no other options.
A lot of people think that she is amazing b/c their kid could never get shots and check their sugar, etc. I really want everyone to know that she is no super kid. She was just like every other kid out there....deathly afraid of shots and needles. We needed two, sometimes three people to hold her down for her shots for the first 8 months! She would scream and cry and ask us why we kept hurting her if we loved her?! It was heartbreaking and traumatic. It was the same response any child would have. And like any other child, she has learned to accept her fate. I wrote a lot about her journey here: http://texasneals.blogspot.com/2007/11/national-diabetes-awareness-month.html. Don't get me wrong, she is remarkable!!!!! I am in awe of how she has handled all of this.
This disease is my fourth "child." A "child" I didn't ask for but have to take care of nonetheless. It requires so much energy that some days I think I won't make it. But then I think about how I only have to take care of this "child" for 12 more years.....Suzannah will have to take care of it for the rest of her life. She will have to set her alarm every night somewhere between 12 and 2am to wake up and check her blood sugar. She will have to be conscious about her level of activity and what she has eaten before she drives home to visit from college. She will have to be careful constantly once she becomes a mother in charge of caring for her little ones. She will have to educate her friends on how to take care of her if she goes into a diabetic seizure. She will have to always be thinking and aware of so many things. She will never be able to be totally free. Sometimes I get so bogged down in the added complications of her life. I just rattled off a few things that run through a mothers mind when she has had a rough day managing her daughters sugar: A low that caused her to have to pour orange juice all over her daughter to try and get some of in down her throat as her daughter used all her strength to fight it. A high that caused her daughter to feel horrible and act in ways that she knew she shouldn't. Struggling w/ expectations and consequences for misbehavior during the high. Wondering how it all will affect her at college, having children, being a wife....in every area of her life.
Please know that we keep everything in perspective. She is doing fine. She looks great and is growing great. It is just hard. However, there is hope that maybe someday she will be free from this disease and that all the things I just mentioned will be a thing of the past. They are constantly studying and doing research for a cure. They are getting close. My prayer is that they will find a cure in time for Suzannah and all the other kids out there to benefit from it. That is why, in honor of her two year anniversary, we have decided to sign up to do a Walk to Cure Diabetes. I put a link on the upper left hand corner of my blog. It will be September 27 in Dallas. When you click the link you can donate money for the research or you can sign up to walk w/ us. Suzannah is so excited about it. I think it makes her feel special. :) I know that many of you continue to pray for her and I want you to know how very much that means to us! Thank you all for the encouragment you give her. See you at the walk!!! :)